The feral red wolf with a **** eating grin (cloudchaser_s) wrote,
The feral red wolf with a **** eating grin

Shower thoughts 2/8

One liners I like from

I often see some things that people said on the Internet that are so stupid I can’t bring myself to correct them because I know that will only cause them to reply, and I couldn’t possibly deal with another stupid thing they say

Bill Cosby and Marilyn Manson are polar opposites: One is a serial rapist who provided wholesome family-friendly entertainment, while the other is a pretty cool guy who performs dark and brooding music

I want pets to be allowed at more places and children under 6 to not be

In 2017, I can say, “Alexa, open Domino’s and place my easy order,” and it will be exactly the way I want it, but in 2364, Captain Picard has to specify exactly how he wants his tea every single time

A $20 machine on my kitchen counter helps me drink bananas

Old music sounds better than today’s music because nobody remembers the bad ones

Mute villains must be the most dangerous because they can’t waste a whole bunch of time with villainous dialogue that gives the hero a chance to turn the tables

Every “Fat girls are beautiful” meme is still measuring women’s value by their looks. You never see “Fat guys are hot” memes

People who shun scientific methods to increasing their health and lifespan in favour of ancient and traditional methods are basically placing their trust in people who had a life expectancy of 45 years

Managers should have to get letters of recommendation from people below them before moving up to a higher position

After you highlight text, the Caps Lock button should change it from uppercase to lowercase and vice versa

Donating a kidney is considered heroic. Donating three kidneys gets you arrested

In the year 2020, it will be 4/20 for an entire month

Having kids is like having really drunk friends who take 18-25 years to sober up

The TV show “My 600 Pound Life” could either be about a really fat person or a very frugal British person

You can watch any other species have sex on basic cable and it’s considered “educational” but as soon as it’s our own it’s considered perverted and shamed

Drinking alcohol to get drunk is just drinking poison in the right dose to mess you up but not kill you

The fact that women’s menstrual cycles can sync up if they live in close quarters is probably nature’s way of messing with guys who thought a harem was a good idea

We receive Amber Alerts when children are missing. We should also receive alerts when they are found so we can have peace of mind
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